Wednesday, August 12, 2009
For the record...
For the record, I am not okay. I did not deserve any of this. I try to be strong and move on with the day, but I can't. I can't cope, I can't think straight, I can't be a good mom, and I can't find an effin job. I think everything has caught up to me and I realize how messed up life has become. I was supposed to be in a trusting marriage, happy family, and it's turned to shit. I wish I could forgive and move on but things keep popping up and stomping my heart. Deep down, I feel like I am going crazy. My car is being repoed, I can't work cause I can't afford day care, and then I have an RN license which can get me money to get out of this burden, but then no one is hiring. Life is crazy. I hope a year from now I can look back and say, "Whew, that was hard but look how much stronger I am." For the present, I just want to crawl in a hole and not talk to anyone and waste away. I feel horrible and ugly and worthless right now.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
 Ed, Dad, Jeep says...Hi. This blog is for all of you to post your latest info, thoughts, pictures, etc. You can also add upcoming events or book and movie recommendations, or create new sections of things you want to share with everyone. I hope you will all use it! If you want to add a blog post or update any of the links or lists on the right side, you'll need to login at the top (so keep track of your login info). Once you've logged in, click new post (at the top) to add a blog post in the middle section here, or click the little hammer and screwdriver next to any section you want to edit. |
2 comments:
Good things will come your way! I truly believe that. It may not feel like it, but you are handling these challenges! You are so worth it!
Hang in there. I know it's hard to do, but try to think of the positives. As a friend told me recently, "This too shall pass." At least you have figured things out now - it took me about 15 years!
Post a Comment