Coming to Colorado

Hey all I arrive in Denver early on Tuesday and will stay through Sat. Hope to see you all while I'm there.

Thank you

Thank you all who came over for Aidan's birthday party.  We all had a great time.  I really appreciate everyone helping, I couldn't have done it without you - well, I guess I could clean up but it would have taken a lot longer.  

Aidan thanks you all for his gifts.  It's was funny when I asked what his favorite part of his birthday was, he said "Chocolate!"  However, he woke in the morning at 4 am because he had a belly ache but he insisted on wearing the shoes Mindy and Gavin got him.  And Deana, he has been wearing his soccer shirt since last night and refuses to take it off, as well as the camo- shorts.  We are getting the ball out tomorrow - it's ready to go though so if anyone wants to come play with the kids in the sprinkler feel free.

That's it for now.

Thanks again.

Love,

Kristi

In Hiding

I have been feeling the same as KK and Deana, but I have been avoiding it and keeping busy. I took yesterday off because there is only so much support I have to give to others when my own mental state is fragile. So I took a long bike ride in the rain. It seemed fitting. It hardly seems like a year has passed. It seems so fresh in my mind. I remember the night that Deana and I spent the night at the hospital toward the end like it was yesterday. At the same time I have hope. I am proud and excited to see the house come to completion and I think Ed would too....hang in there everyone.

Shona

To Dad!

I feel the same, Deana.  I have dreams and memories about Dad all the time.  It is very hard.  I year ago, we were all in the hospital watching our father go.  It is so painful and it feels like yesterday. I remember the last lucid moment I had with him.  I told him I loved him, and he lifted up his face and kissed me.  It meant and still means so much to me.  There are many times I think about what I could have done different with my time with him.  Or I think about how I never really appreciated him for who he was until it was too late.  I was so caught up, growing up, thinking he didn't love me or wasn't proud but he always was.  I was just too self absorbed to see it.  So I will take this pain of knowing that, and I will try to be better with others.  I will try to appreciate and love people how they are and not how I expect them to be.  

Dad was such a good person and I miss him so much.  It is so hard knowing we won't see him again.   I think about him daily and hopefully as time goes by, I will remember all the good times,  more than him dying.  We should all maybe use this site to write happy memories of him so we will all remember and will be able to tell the children.  I think that is what he would want. 

grieving

I don't know how anyone else is feeling right now about tomorrow, but I am not doing well. The memories from the hospital stays keep creeping into my consciousness. Even when I'm not traveling memory lane, I feel depressed, constantly on the verge of tears, exhausted, and not motivated to do anything. I've been like this for a few days now...

So this morning, Aidan asked about Papa Ed.  I have always told him when he died he went into the stars.  He said, "We should get some gloves, and pull the stars, and then pull Papa Ed out of the stars.  Isn't that a great idea?"  

It was very cute.

Happy Mom's Day!

Jill's art show

Hi guys--the Colorado Academy of Art art show to finish off the year has been changed. The new date is May 31st (they forgot the 23rd was memorial day weekend and don't want to do it then). I'll know more soon and give you the final update.

Here's what I feel right now:  time for change.  I think I have a cycle in my life that promotes change.  I just recently noticed this.

The link goes to an entry in my blog.

Mistaken Identity

My postings & comments since April 22 are credited to Elkheart, who is Craig, not me. Sorry if this caused any confusion.

The Soccer Star

I don't know what happened to Cody today, but I have never seen him play soccer like he played it today. Usually he likes to play "D," but today he was on offense. His team won 3-0 with Cody assisting on 2 of those goals. He would have made another goal but it was blocked by his scout buddy's face (who happened to be on the opposing team). We were even short 2 players, so we had no subs; therefore, all the boys played the entire game with only small breaks between quarters. He controlled the ball; he ran the ball down the field multiple times; he passed the ball perfectly; he was always in the right position. If they gave out MVP awards, he would have won it today. :-)