To Dad!

I feel the same, Deana.  I have dreams and memories about Dad all the time.  It is very hard.  I year ago, we were all in the hospital watching our father go.  It is so painful and it feels like yesterday. I remember the last lucid moment I had with him.  I told him I loved him, and he lifted up his face and kissed me.  It meant and still means so much to me.  There are many times I think about what I could have done different with my time with him.  Or I think about how I never really appreciated him for who he was until it was too late.  I was so caught up, growing up, thinking he didn't love me or wasn't proud but he always was.  I was just too self absorbed to see it.  So I will take this pain of knowing that, and I will try to be better with others.  I will try to appreciate and love people how they are and not how I expect them to be.  

Dad was such a good person and I miss him so much.  It is so hard knowing we won't see him again.   I think about him daily and hopefully as time goes by, I will remember all the good times,  more than him dying.  We should all maybe use this site to write happy memories of him so we will all remember and will be able to tell the children.  I think that is what he would want.